My wife and I just went to a Neptune presentation today. We saw an ad in the local newspaper that highlighted, “Leave your wallets and checkbooks at home” and scheduled an appointment. There were a few differences in her presentation and facts from what I have read in this stream, such as the cost of a funeral doubles every five years (not 12) and there is only one package, you can’t create your own package and pre-pay. The cost was $2629.29 BUT that was because the price had just been raised 2 days ago, March 1, by $100 but because she begged the company it agreed to let her offer the old price until the end of this week AND then she gave us a coupon which, if we purchased the package within 6 days, would give us another $200 off. Each. Now, it’s unlikely that I will outlive my wife (well, most days it’s unlikely) as I am 73 and she is 29, so the $200 coupon for her is really worthless as its real time value would be eroded by the CPI and be about nil when she dies at the age of 87. Besides, I’m guessing that she will have already married another rich guy and cost will not be an issue. At one point I asked a question and her answer annoyed me. They will bury me at sea, yes. It’s part of the package. But if my wife wants to tag along on the boat to make sure I’m dead and gone, they would charge her $695. Huh? Having recently gone through the new car-buying kabuki dance, I thought that she might tell us any minute now that she would go back to her sales manager’s office and see if she couldn’t get him to authorize an even lower price if it would get us to sign a contract before we left today because we were such nice folks. There were three other couples at this presentation and she did say, at the outset, she would like to meet with each of us individually after the presentation. One of the couples wanted to meet right after and we set a date for the end of the week. I knew I would want to do my due diligence before I got the hard sell. So, I came home and googled, “cremation services like Neptune’ and here I am. Oh well. We did get a tasty free lunch at an Italian restaurant and it only cost us an hour of our time, counting the lunchtime. Since time is money, it was not quite a free lunch, but as a retiree, I’ve found there is no such thing as time.